Jealous....but why?

I have been thinking a lot about how I view other people and their situations, lives, opinions, etc. Sometimes I find myself being jealous of other women in different life situations or stages than myself. Women who have older children and seem to have the perfect marriage or the single girl who gets to go out with her friends whenever she wants without having to find a babysitter, budget it into the family expenses or clear it with her spouse to make sure nothing else is planned. The woman that gets to go full board with her hobbies or interests without a secnd thought. It’s not that I don’t like my life or am dissatisfied…it’s just sometimes…you wish you had a different life for just a day…an hour…a minute.

(Especially when I’m trying my best not to get a coma from my head falling on my desk due to my severe lack of sleep because my son was so unbearably uncomfortable because of constipation and gas that he couldn’t sleep without being consoled….I could use a nap of any amount of time, but no…I will go home, take care of my son, help make dinner, lunches for the next day and then watch little man all night so my husband can go to school so we can eventually have a more comfortable life. <<stepping down from soap box now>>)

I was driving home and then it hit me…I’m not jealous of these girls/women because of their life style or choices or circumstances…it’s because they seem so delighted and joyful with their lives and seem grateful for what’s happening to them. Now…I know they may not realize that is how they come off, or they may not feel that way at all, but that’s how I see them. I realized I need to start being more grateful for what I do have and not take it for granted lest it all go away or I miss out on my life because I’m too dumb to see how great it is now.

I have a great man by my side who is always there for me and has been for the past 8 years. Who still finds me attractive and wants to spend time with me and believes in me more than I believe in myself. I still can’t believe that someone this smart and handsome choose me to live out his days with. I have a very handsome son who cracks me up with his carefree, goofy, oddball personality (wonder where he gets that one, lol). I have a home, I have a wonderful family who I can count on no matter what. I have a job that I’m enjoying at the moment. I have great friends who push me to stick with my goals and who are always uplifting at just the right times. So…I need to stop seeing what I don’t have and start being grateful for what more I do have and have a little faith in how I have chosen to live my life…because I did choose this life.

I am grateful as well to those women I was jealous of because it brought me to this conclusion and determination to change my attitude. To change things about myself I have control over and to accept those that I don't. I hope those women are really as happy as they are in my mind and if not, maybe knowing that I was jealous of them would make them a bit more appreciative of their own circumstances. Maybe my realization of this will help me be more accepting and understanding of other woman and hope they return the same.  

Be Grateful. Be Happy. Be YOU!

Sharon